Posted: Wednesday, 26 March 2008 01:08
by Dave Mindeman
Michele Bachmann, after looking at the ongoing Iraq situation... examining the American economic downturn....and of course, examining all the so called "facts" about global warming....has decided that action is required. It is time for the "Light Bulb Freedom of Choice Act."
Yes, America, Ms. Bachmann has come to rescue the incandescent light bulb from those scientific jargon talking, energy conserving, environmentalist whackos, who want to send it into oblivion. You know those crazies who are trying to save on energy consumption and maybe a little money, for the general public, in the process.
The Light Bulb Freedom of Choice Act. Great name. I'll bet you didn't even know that your choices were being threatened. You have freedom of speech, freedom of religion, and a right to assembly...but, by gosh man, we have to save our inherent right to the light bulb of our own choosing. Well, not to worry. Rep. Bachmann plans to rescue us from this diabolical dilemma.
The plan was to phase out those incandescent light bulbs and "force" everyone to use those energy conscious, money saving fluorescent ones. It is an insidious plot which Ms. Bachmann has cleverly linked to those godless "global warming" conspiricists, trying to limit our inherent right of dependence on foreign oil. Think of the ramifications! Why, if we saved too much energy with this national "mandate", we might cause oil production to fall, gas prices to drop, coal burning plants would have to cut back, Exxon might have a billion less in profits, and we might even lose our incentive to continue the Iraq War.
This shall not stand!
The incandescent light bulb has its champion....and her name is Michele Bachmann. With a Bible in one hand and an autographed picture of Sen. James Inhofe in the other, Rep. Bachmann will fight for your right to increased wattage. With God on her side, (as she always is), and the oil lobby cheering her on, Michele Bachmann will carry, and fight for, this important, right affirming, legislation through the hallowed halls of Congress run by those godless Democrats.
She will win your right to the bulb of your choice. Let your "light" shine and consume that extra energy, forever!
