Posted: 06/16/18 20:28
by Dave Mindeman
Headline: Trump says he gave North Korea's Kim his direct number
Trump: Hello?
Kim: Hello Big Donnie. It's me Kim.
Trump: Well, hi, Lego Man, how goes the grind.
Kim: Oh, just doing my thing. Arrested a few people. Executed some deserters. Expanded my gulags. Played some buckets with Rodman. And made everyone watch me eat a seven course meal on State TV.
Trump: Sounds like a full day. I love the way everyone pays so much attention to what you do. They really, really love you.
Kim: Hey, Donnie boy, I expect nothing less. I get their loyalty -or else.
Trump: That's what I like about you Short Round. You stay on point. Wish I didn't have to cow tow to the free media. They can mess up my narrative really bad. Say, you plan to have any military parades soon? I'd sure like to be there. Love the hardware.
Kim: Sure Donnie, my man. I can conjure up some big equipment shows anytime. My army does a mean goose step. Love to have you as my guest.
Trump: Great, ButterBall, let's have our people get that arranged. Oh, by the way, how's that nuke dismantling coming?
Kim: Still getting the inventory together. Might take a few months, maybe years, to get that on paper. But we are working on it. I'll keep you informed.
Trump: Thanks, Stuffing and Gravy, you know how persnickety my deep state can be about getting results. You'd never guess that I just prevented nuclear war.
Kim: Yeah, I get it. My generals got all hot under the collar when our nuclear test site collapsed. Set us back pretty good. But I told them that you would be willing to stall things out until we get back in the groove. I appreciate that you trust me on these things. Nobody else ever has taken my word for things before. But you understand the big lie. We can communicate.
Trump: Yeah, Bubble Boy, we are kindred spirits. Nobody gets my approach here at home either. But you know how this works. It's the show that counts. Keep it superficial and everybody wins......Well, sorry, got to get back to imprisoning kids at the border. Never seems to end down there. But don't be a stranger. You can call me anytime.
Kim: Thanks, Big Donnie, I appreciate that very much. Say hi to Mikey for me. He still owes me for that backgammon game. Bye for now.
